Vincent Berg: Blog

A new story, Singularity. For those who care, the title does not refer to a Physics Singularity, but to a Singularity between the Physical and Spiritual worlds, and since it's a science-fiction story, it takes an unusual approach in exploring where the two overlap.

It's a short story (18 chapters) featuring very short chapters (only 1,000 to 4,000 words each). It's posting a single chapter every Wednesday.

With the posting of chapter 4 of "The Lad Who Poked the Devil in the Eye", I've restructured the first five chapters (1 - 4) of the story, as well as removing a couple sections (in the Prologue and the new chapter 1) and revised a bit of the first chapter.

The reason for this is that, because of its slow start, readers never realized the essential story conflicts until chapter 4. Now, everyone understands what Otis is facing upfront, even if they don't know the details, so the story flashes back to the beginning.

If you're curious, feel free to reread chapter 1, but otherwise, I wouldn't bother with the other chapters, as essentially nothing has changes other than the presentation.

If you haven't started the story yet, then don't worry about it. The story is now stronger than it was before.

Vincent (aka. Crumbly)

btw, if you want to see the chapters in their more natural format (and a day earlier), visit www.crumblywriter.net.

My story "The Lad Who Poked the Devil in the Eye" almost never saw the light of day. I realized it had some significant problems. The main character, who talks to himself, was seen as 'disturbing', and the beginning of the story consists of back story necessary to understand the rest of the story (a no-no in writing).

I tried rewriting the story (which explains the memory sequence in the Prologue), to feature this information as a flashback while jumping directly into the action, but it just didn't work (there was too much that depended on what unfolds earlier).

Now that I'm four chapters into the story (3 + the prologue) and not getting much feedback, I'm questioning the story again. In short, I may take another look at rewriting the initial chapters. We'll see whether I can do any better this time. If so, I'll post an updated story (after this one completes, before I post it to SOL). That way you can compare the two. I'm already considering scenes to cut.

This is the sequel to "Stranded", recently republished under the name of "Stranded in a Foreign Land" with an all-new cover (the cover displayed here is still the old one).

"The Lad Who Poked the Devil in the Eye" (long title, I know, but it fits), was inspired by the 2nd government shutdown by the U.S. Congress. Instead of continuing the story of Josh and his friends (who'll be traveling to another world for another 38 years), this book explores what happens if the world doesn't follow Josh's advice to change how the world governments operate.

The story starts slowly, but speeds up later in the story (chapter 5). I tried restructuring it, using flashbacks, but it never really worked. In order to understand the story, you really need to understand the full backstory told in sequence, otherwise you won't understand why Otis responds as he does (not telling anyone what he knows, among other things).

This story does not feature Josh or the others who left the planet, though it might feature a few of those left behind. It takes place 12 years after Josh left the Earth behind, so the impetus to change has lessened. Chapter #1 introduces the main players in the story, while the Prologue, like in the original, details how the government responds to learning the aliens have returned.

This story, as you might expect, is as dark and paranoid as "Stranded" was. (Sorry, my future stories are a little brighter.)

Hope you enjoy it, it took a long time to bring together.

By the way, a short note about the long delay between stories. I've been writing steadily the entire time, but in order to perfect my writing, I hired a well-respected professional editor. (I'll detail the changes to my writing style later.) That didn't work out so well, not the least because it took months to schedule her, two months for her to finish, and months to figure out how to handle what she delivered (she had issues with the story, getting much of her advice wrong).

However, I've got several stories waiting to go. "Singularity", a story of a NASA experiment gone terribly wrong will be published on Feb. 10th, and will post here once "Poking the Devil" ends. The story that delayed everything else, "A House in Disarray", about a lesbian NYPD detective responsible for investigating the NY Police Commissioner, is undergoing final editing (to correct the editor's mistakes). (Honestly, the story is tighter and reads much smoother, and has zero sci-fi in it, but it's taken forever to finish.)

Well, it's been a long time, but I've got a backlog of stories for you. The first is the sequel to "Stranded". Only, Josh hasn't been seen for ages, and isn't expected back for another 35 years, and his friends are scattered.

"The Lad Who Poked the Devil in the Eye" starts slowly, but finishes well.

I'll provide a more complete summary next week, when it begins posting as a serial.

By the way, visit www.crumblywriter.net.