Chapter 52: A New Year in a New Dream

“It’s a new year, but I feel as if I’m in a dream.” Gabriel says uncertainly.

“What do you mean?”

“I dream of you every night and I reach out for you, but you are getting further and further away from me. But then if I look hard enough I can see me on the other side of the expanse, so technically you’re getting closer to me. I don’t know if the dream is the dream or if you are or if I am. All I know is I love you and I know whatever is happening is in its final stages. I don’t know how I know, I just know. I feel to get what I always wanted I have to give up what I always wanted. Molly, early on you and one of the messengers said something just like that. Do you know what is going on?”

“All I know is we are right where we started. What was done had to be done, but what is coming has already been done. We are not the dream, the dream is as most dreams are; they are made up of hopes, goals and distractions. Even though I have never met you, I love you with all my heart. Gabriel, please don’t let go of me.”

“I would never let go of you.”

“Don’t you understand, you already have.”

“What?” and Gabriel sits up in the darkness covered in sweat. He reaches over and puts his hand on Molly and says, “I’ll never let go, my Molly.

In her sleep Molly mutters, “Amen.”

Gabriel smiles and turns on his side and pulls Molly to him and holds her tight. Come morning time Molly has to wake Gabriel up because his grip is so tight she can’t get up to go pee.

Gabriel has been getting a sense of urgency in all things. He turns the farm and the girls over to the Nuns and makes sure the farm and the girls have enough money to do whatever they choose to do in life. Of course, both Molly and Gabriel hope the girls will all get educated in pertinent fields and then carry on the companies and charities that Gabriel started and Molly and Gabriel saw through to glory.

Everybody stayed up to celebrate the New Year, but when the clock struck midnight something died in Gabriel. He looks around him and all he sees is love and life. All he knows is it is time to go. Gabriel has exactly what he always wanted his entire life, but now it feels more like a dream than reality. Like it was never meant for him. The heartbreak is profound, but the joy illuminates all.

It is only two weeks into January and on several occasions when he looked in the mirror he became transparent and started to fade; only Molly calling out to him brought him back. Molly knows more, but what she knows she cannot say. It may be just that; she may not know what she knows. Or is it another miracle Jesus has done and asked for the graced person not to tell; for reasons Gabriel has always found allusive in scripture.

There are sixty one girls in the house and the thought to go out and get more never even crosses their minds. From the beginning of the new year, in fact on January 1^st, 2022 itself, a girl a night would fulfill what Gabriel talked to Molly about into letting one girl a night sleep with them. Of course a loving family and the radiant love of little girls many nights were found to have a bed full of love, hope and faith anyway. They ended up putting the two babies in their room on Christmas night, but when Gabriel decided to share one night with each of the girls, Molly let the Sisters take the two babies.

There was no, ‘I’ll see you later’, Molly said, “Goodbye.”

For the next fifty nine days one of the girls was being held and cuddled by Gabriel in his and Molly’s bed. Two months later he wakes up and says, “It’s time.” Molly knows.

The couple of extra days they have until March 1st they spend with all the girls in the main living room doing one of their pajama party sleepovers. Gabriel reaches over and turns on the stereo and they all dance. Gabriel has enough memories to last an eternity; God hopes so does Molly. Molly smiles because she knows she’ll see them all again, but Gabriel is not so sure. Molly has seen the Book of Life, Molly is the Book of Life, so it is easier for her to let go. Gabriel gives his kitty Charlie a long hug goodbye; like he didn’t get to last time.

They don’t take the Harley, they don’t even take the motor home, they take a new all black Dodge Charger with as much horsepower as it can produce. Just in case they have to get there in a hurry, wherever there is. The windows are all blacked out, in hopes that not even destiny can see in. Gabriel looks down and sees Molly’s hand in his, and that is enough for him.

“Ready?”

“Ready.”

They point their Charger towards California and go. It will end where it began. They have until Easter to do whatever it is they have been commanded to do by their Lord and Savior. This year of 2022, Easter is on April 17^th, which will make Molly thirteen years and thirteen days old.

“Have you ever wondered why we have been given this time?” this time it is Molly who is caught off guard by the out of the blue question.

“I like to think it’s because we earned it, but the truth is probably not so easily discernible. Perhaps somebody pleaded with the Lord on your, our behalf.”

“You think? I like that. Certainly my mom would be up their rallying the troops for me, because she would know and understand without judgment that you are the girl for me.”

“Perhaps. Perhaps it was someone you didn’t know, but saved just the same.”

“Maybe. I certainly have always helped people when I had the chance. Even when I was a low-life piece of garbage, I still had the ability to talk to people’s hearts and spirits, and as you know a simple word can heal or break someone in need.”

“I wish I could have had the chance to...” she trails off.

“You still have time.”

Yes, time. Funny thing is time, it appears to be linear, but it’s not.”

“I know what you mean. With a simple memory you are back in the past. With every longing hope you are in the future. I guess it comes from having an eternal Living God.”

“You think?”

“Who knows, my precious babygirl. I know I love you and I know I will not let go.” Gabriel never told her about that dream, but she knows exactly what he is talking about.

“I’m proud of you, Gabriel. For the hand you were dealt in life, you found your way home anyway.”

“I’m proud of you too. Its funny, most of my life was spent fantasizing what a better life I wanted, it wasn’t until I met you that it became real. Thank you.” Molly starts crying. “Hey now what’s wrong?”

“Nothing.” she says in a small voice.

“Yeah right. What’s wrong, babygirl?”

“The journey ahead of us has been decided, I just hope you still want me when we get to the end.”

“Hey now what kind of talk is that?

“Gabriel?”

“Yeah honey?”

“If you could choose to spend eternity with one person, would it be me?”

“No other,” that makes Molly happy and hopeful. “Though I think eternity will also be a community. Either way I will not let go.”

“If you do, would you come find me again?”

“Forever and a day I would search the stars for my love and I would not quit until her hand, your hand, rested in mine once more.” Molly reaches over and takes his hand and then she melts into the seat and watches Gabriel dreamily. Gabriel laughs and drives on.

What should have taken only a week of leisurely driving to get to California; it took the entire month of March. As Gabriel thinks back on it he can’t remember stopping a single time. He does not like the loss of time, he feels like he got robbed of time and memories with Molly. Though eternity is a long time, not being able to embrace your love every moment of every day is a loss incalculable. Memories are time cataloged.