Chapter 5

Communication is all about conveying an idea, an impression, or an experience from one person to another. When the topic of communication is discussed, it is normal to consider the words of natural languages, such as English, as being the means by which information is delivered. The story teller takes a pen in hand and chooses words with care to convey a human experience. The scientist or engineer struggles to find the proper terms, using language and mathematics, to describe some technical concept.

However, those who have the greatest ability in communicating, may not always have the best skills with words. The musician, with a deft hand on the bow, can evoke emotions that cause the heart to race and the eyes to tear. The dancer, with a grace of movement, can convey patterns of life that transcend culture. The painter, with brush in hand, can express a moment in time with a clarity that no words could ever achieve.

Look not to an author for purity of communications. The words used by an author convey only half of the story. It is the reader who completes it. The reader makes a conscious decision to participate in the experience. It is the reader who, with his or her imagination, fills in the blanks. The reader imposes details on the suggested imagery, and generates the emotions.

On the other hand, the artist, the musician, and the dancer pull observers into his or her world, wraps them in emotion, and carries them through the experience. The observer must make a conscious decision, in order to not participate in the experience. That is the true power of art.

It is at the climax of experiencing art, that moment when sound, movement, or image breaks through our barriers to touch the soul, that we learn just how feeble words are in communicating the sublime. Knowing this, the author struggles on, hoping one day to manage the sublime knowing that even the best efforts of past grand masters have fallen short.

Mrs. Shapiro considered herself to be a diligent student of the art of communication, if not a near master of it. She had trained from a young age in dance, both in classical and modern forms. She learned to play the piano and the bongo drums. She sketched life models, and painted landscapes with watercolors. She had studied drama in college. She had minored in oratory and debate. She even dabbled in writing fiction. Having discovered that there were no jobs for one with her skills, she returned to college and picked up a degree in education.

Danny walked into the room and announced, “I’m here. Convince me I should stay here.”

She said, “You are Danny Markem. You have been described to me, but I fear the description is far more flattering than the reality.”

Danny stood there looking at her. She was a small flighty looking woman who reminded him of a sparrow. There was also a sense of the dramatic about her.

“I understand by your challenge that you are not particularly enthused about learning the arts.”

Danny shrugged his shoulders and replied, “I’ve never given it much thought. I’m more interested in mathematics, science, and reading.”

“And you are taking those subjects in college, are you not?”

“Yes.”

“This is not college, but it is a school. You should be here to learn, not to use the time like some kind of an extended study hall.”

“I’d prefer not to drop some of the courses where I get extra time to study.”

“Do you consider yourself to be good at communicating ideas?”

“Yes, I guess I do. My college papers get A’s.”

“Can you take a woman into your arms and, without speaking a word, convince her to drop all inhibitions, as well as her clothes, and spend the night making mad passionate love with you?”

“Are you kidding?”

“Then you need to learn to dance,” she said. “Dance is the physical language of seduction. All young men should know how to dance.”

“I suppose,” Danny said.

“You are not a handsome man.”

“Gee, thanks.”

“Neither is Joe Pecsi, Bill Murray, Samuel Jackson, or Rowan Adkinson. Yet, if any of those gentlemen were to enter a cocktail party, they would quickly be surrounded by a number of attractive women. It would not be their fame that draws the women to them like moths to a flame. It is that they have a presence which they can communicate without the use of words. Do you have that presence?”

“No.”

“Then you need to learn drama,” she said. “Drama is about sending out the message that you are important and present. It’s about looking and feeling the part which you are playing in the moment.”

“I guess that makes sense.”

“Can you convince a woman to move and sway in a sexy manner from across the room?”

“No.”

“Then you need to learn to make music because music is a language of sound for invoking emotions.”

“Women do like musicians.”

“Can you create an image that convinces wealthy people to invest in your idea?”

“No.”

“Then you need to learn to draw and paint. A picture is worth a thousand words. Even better, with a good picture you don’t even need to choose the words.”

“I can see where that could be useful.”

Mrs. Shapiro said, “You were described as being very smart. The word genius was even used.”

Danny said, “I do have a high IQ.”

“I do not think you are so smart. I think you are a foolish young man, who is marching down a road to failure.”

“Excuse me?”

“Success in this world is not achieved by having ideas, discovering new things, and inventing new objects. It comes from communicating those ideas, discoveries, and inventions to others. It comes from convincing them that your idea, discovery, or invention is important; and that they should take note of it. That can only be done if you know how to grab their imagination, pull them into your world, and have them experience it for themselves.

“Until you learn how to do these things, you will be a failure. At this moment in time, the opportunity to discover the road to success is available to you. It is likely to be the last opportunity that you will ever have to learn it. Like a fool, you stand here questioning the wisdom of taking the time to learn something new.

“Yes, I do not think you are so smart.”

“What can I say?” Danny said rather stunned by her assessment of him.

She reached up and tapped his temple. “You think your intelligence resides here, but you’re only partially correct.” She tapped him on the chest over the heart. “Some of your intelligence lives here.”

She stepped back and said, “You need to exercise both.”

“Brian Tracy said, ‘Just as your car runs more smoothly and requires less energy to go faster and farther when the wheels are in perfect alignment, you perform better when your thoughts, feelings, emotions, goals, and values are in balance.’ He might be right.”

“Of course he is,” she said. “So will you continue to focus solely on your mathematics and words, or will you learn the other ways to think and communicate?”

“I guess I’ll do what you suggest,” Danny said.

“I understand you often quote other people.”

“Yes. I have found that people find it more difficult to argue with Aristotle, than with me.”

“My father was a great fan of Vince Lombardi. The great coach once said, ‘The quality of a person’s life is in direct proportion to their commitment to excellence, regardless of their chosen field of endeavor.’ The lack of commitment in your voice does not bode well for success in this endeavor.”

“Of course I’m tentative, I’m walking on unfamiliar ground,” Danny said.

“You have missed much of the early part of my dance course and have much to learn before you are ready to participate with the rest of the class. This is my free period. You will come here and learn the basics for two weeks before joining the rest of the class.”

“I guess that would work,” Danny said.

“We shall begin with the simplest of dances, the box step.”

“Okay.”

“I have selected a special dance partner for you,” Mrs. Shapiro said.

“You have?” he asked.

She stood there for a second marshaling her thoughts. Finally, she said, “You are not the only one who is here to learn. She too is a student, but the lesson she is to learn is different from yours. She has the potential to be a great beauty, but for now she is merely attractive. I have undertaken the difficult task of polishing away some of the ugliness so that what remains is truly beautiful, but I fear that you may not enjoy your role in it.”

“My role?”

“Yes, you are the brace against which I will hold her while I remove the rough edges that detract from her beauty. It may not be pleasant for you, but you will learn much in the process as well.”

“Let’s do it,” Danny said.

Mrs. Shapiro went to the door and opened it. Leaning out, she said, “I’m ready for you.”

“It’s about time,” the girl outside said.

The girl walked into the room. She took one look at Danny and said, “Oh my God! You didn’t tell me that I was supposed to teach the creepy guy to dance. Just the idea of him putting his hands on me makes me ill.”

Mrs. Shapiro ignored her outburst. Turning to Danny, she said, “As you can see, Denise is an attractive girl. Her face is beautiful, her complexion divine. Her brunette hair is long and silky. She has a figure that is shapely. Her breasts are perfect. She has a nice derriere. Her long legs are perfectly formed. She is a very attractive girl.”

“Too attractive to pawed by him,” Denise said.

“I know that young men, such as yourself, are often intimidated by such an attractive girl.”

Denise said, “Rightfully so.”

Danny just looked at Denise with an expression of disgust.

Continuing on, Mrs. Shapiro said, “Do not dance with the woman who stands before you today. Dance with the woman who would stand before you in the future. In ten years, her complexion will dry and her face will wrinkle. Her hair will get thicker and stiff. Her breasts and butt will sag. Her legs will look like cottage cheese when the cellulite forms. Her shape will change from curving inward to outward. Dance with that woman.”

It was at that moment, Danny decided that Mrs. Shapiro was a truly remarkable woman!

“I didn’t come here to be insulted,” Denise said.

“Neither did Danny,” Mrs. Shapiro said pointedly.

“I...”

“You came to me for beauty tips. Here is your first tip – beauty is as beauty does. Acting the role of harridan is not beautiful.”

Denise frowned. She wasn’t quite sure what a harridan was, but figured it wasn’t nice.

“Let us begin with our first lesson in dancing.”

Danny said, “Okay.”

“I’d rather not,” Denise said.

Ignoring Denise, Mrs. Shapiro said, “Dancing is a conversation between a man and a woman. It begins with the approach. The man approaches the woman and asks for her to dance with him. This can be done with a simple gesture or with a verbal request. The gesture is rather presumptuous as it presupposes that the woman is willing to dance, but it may be necessary in an environment with loud music. Nothing is worse than shouting in a woman’s ear.”