Chapter 17

Even though I got home at almost midnight, I was up early to catch Mom before she went to work. I hadn’t seen her in days and she looked incredibly tired. Ever since we’d moved here, she’d basically worked seven days a week to keep us afloat except for a rare day off here or there. It was a wake-up call, in a sense. It reminded me of what I was really doing this for.

The recognition and support was great, but if I kept pushing, I’d be able to make an actual difference in our lives. My goal needed to be helping Mom quit one of her jobs and still be able to keep food on the table, because I didn’t know how long Mom could take working every single day. “You look beat,” I said, sitting across from her. “You were asleep when I came home last night. It’s been a while since that’s happened.”

Despite how much she was working, she had still made breakfast for us.

“It was just a tough day yesterday. One of the other crews quit, so they added half their schedule to our list of buildings to clean. Plus, I haven’t had my coffee yet.”

“Thanks for making breakfast.”

“Of course, kiddo. I’ll always make breakfast for us. Since we don’t have Saturday mornings anymore, this is the only special time we have left. I feel like I hardly get to see you anymore.”

“I know. My schedule has gotten crazy. I mean, not as hard as yours, but it does make it hard to find time together. I do have something for you, though.”

I hadn’t seen her since I was paid on Friday, so I hadn’t had a chance to give her the check I’d gotten from the bank for half my paycheck. She took it and half looked at it before looking again, more seriously.

“Charlie,” she said, starting to sound angry. “We’d agreed you would keep half your check.”

“That is half my check,” I said, smiling.

“What? How? This is twice what it should be.”

“They’re paying me to play, as well as for the work in the kitchen. I only play for half an hour and my cut of that is almost as much as what I make for all the other work. What’s even better is they said last night that, since I’m bringing out a whole new crowd for them, they’re going to give me the entire first hour. I haven’t actually talked to Willie yet about how that changes my cut, but knowing Willie, I’m betting I’ll get a larger share. Plus, the band gets paid based on the audience, and if my hour manages to bring out a whole new group, there will be more overall to spread across all of us, in addition to getting a larger percentage.”

I was surprised when she didn’t seem excited by that.

“Charlie, I’m not sure this is a good idea. This is the kind of thing that led your dad to skip college and try making it as a full-time musician. We both saw how that worked out. I don’t want you getting a taste of this life and letting it push you into bad decisions.”

“I promise it won’t, Mom. I understand that my first priority is school. It’s why I’m only playing one day a week.”

“You’ve been going to practice a lot too.”

“Most of that extra practice time was coming out of the time I spent training with Chef, so it’s not that much extra time, and we’ll be back to only practices on Friday’s next week.”

“Charlie, I want you to listen. You’re young and it’s hard to see where things could end up. I watched your dad go through this and heard a lot of horror stories over the years. You just started playing for them two weeks ago, and they’ve already increased your time. What if this goes well? Will they ask you to play Friday nights and Sunday nights? What if they see the extra money and decide to add music to the rest of the week?”

“Chef believes in schooling. He makes sure I get my homework done first, before anything else. He might expand it to Sunday and Friday, but I’d bet he gets me out after my set and lets Willie finish off the second set on Sundays. That would mean I’d be coming home the same time I do now, working in the kitchen. He wouldn’t push me to do something that would hurt my school work.”

“Maybe, but I think it’s time I call this Chef of yours and have a serious talk with him.”

“Mom, please don’t mess this up for me.”

“Charlie, I need you to remember who’s in charge here. I love you. I want you to have everything you dream of, but you’re only sixteen years old. I know this lecture’s going to go in one ear and out the other, because I’m sure you’ll hear it from other grown-ups and discount it, but I want you to listen. Do you know the big difference between grown-ups and kids, even teenagers?”

“You’re smarter than us,” I said, perhaps a bit too flippantly.

“No, and watch the sass. We aren’t smarter, not really. You kids surprise us all the time with just how intelligent you are. What we have that you don’t yet, is experience. We’ve been where you are and made the mistakes. Most of the time you aren’t going to listen to us, and you’ll make the same mistakes, and that’s fine. That’s how you’re really going to learn. Sometimes, though, you need to hear us, especially when the mistakes are too big and you can’t change your decisions afterward. This is one of those times. If you make the choice to follow your dreams and don’t take the necessary steps, just in case those dreams don’t pan out, you won’t be able to go back and get the education you need, at least not easily. I want you to follow your dreams, sweetie, but I want you to be smart about it.”

“I promise you, I’m not going to become Dad. Ever! I plan on going to college, and honestly, this is the only way I see that happening. Can you look at me and honestly say we have any hope of paying for college, even community college, where we are now. Loans and grants only go so far. I think this is a way I can make some money and put it aside for college. I promise I will not let playing music get in the way of what’s important.”

“You’d better not. I’ll let you keep playing, but I want you to understand that if your grades slip, you will not be playing anymore. I’m also going to call and have a talk with this Chef of yours.”

“Okay, but please be careful. I know how you get when you go full mamma bear, and I really don’t want to waste this. Not just the music, but all the training I’ve been getting. I’m in the best shape of my life, and I love it. I even love learning to cook now that I’m working Saturday mornings. I can’t remember a time I was happier than right now, and the Blue Ridge is a big part of that.”

“As long as he promises me that he’ll look out for your best interests and then never breaks that promise, we’ll be fine.”

I groaned and dropped my head down onto the table into my arms.

“Now, tell me what your plans are for today.”

Hanna showed up after Mom had left for work. She was a little later than I’d thought, since it would take time to get down there, but since I was bumming rides, there wasn’t much I could say.

The first stop was Walmart, where she helped me pick out a few new clothes. It wasn’t a lot, since the remaining half of my check wasn’t all that large, but it was enough to add a little variety into my dates and when I played. My original plan went out the window as soon as she saw what I was planning on picking out.

“Nope, no dress pants,” she declared as soon as I started heading towards a rack of pants.

“I thought I should have a pair to wear when I play at the Blue Ridge. The rest of the band wears button-up shirts and slacks, and a few add vests or whatever. I thought if I wore slacks and a button-up shirt, even if it wasn’t white like theirs, it would be close enough.”

“Charlie, not only do you not need to dress like them, but you shouldn’t.”

“Why?”

“The whole point of you playing is to bring a different feel. They don’t need another old blues musician. They have that. They need a young guy who plays modern music to bring in a new audience. You’re that guy. You just need to dress the part.”

“Okay, then how should I dress?”

“Well, if you were playing rock, I’d say a t-shirt with an open flannel. Country and we’d go hat and denim or plain button-up. For you though, your best bet is a t-shirt and jeans.”

“That’s what I wear to school every day. Seems like cheating to wear that on stage too.”

“What you wear to school is ... umm,” she stammered, trying to find a diplomatic choice of words.

“Cheap.”

“I’m trying not to be mean.”

“I know. I don’t have any illusions of who I am, Hanna. We’re poor. Until now, the only things we could afford came from Goodwill. That’s what I’m trying to change. Just tell me what I should get. I’m not going to get mad just because you point out that my clothes are old and worn out.”

“I wasn’t trying to say that. The shirts you have are what a teen boy would wear.”

“Which I am.”

“At school you are. On stage, you’re an artist. Not all t-shirts are the same. Since form-fitted shirts won’t really be available here and can be a little pricy, we’ll go with a plain or maybe ribbed shirt a size down from what you normally wear.”

“Won’t that be tight?”

“That’s the point. You’re starting to put some meat on your bones and getting a little muscle definition. If you keep working with Chef, it’ll be noticeable, and will look good in a tight shirt. The jeans you have are fine. Hell, some people pay a lot of money to have new jeans that look worn out. We’ll still get one good button-up, so you have some options for dates with Rhonda, although I bet once she sees you in a tight t-shirt, she’ll probably prefer that, too.”

“I’m not sure about this.”

“Trust me. On this, I’m right. You want to stand out, and this will look good.”

“Fine, I trust you. Only because I don’t have a clue when it comes to clothes. If I look like an idiot, though, I’m going to come after you.”

“Yeah, yeah,” she said, waving me off and heading towards the shirts.

We ended up finding some on clearance that looked half-way decent and had the fit she liked. I was right when I said I’d feel weird wearing them. It felt like the fabric was trying to squeeze me to death. The only real problem we had was finding ones that didn’t end up being too short. A few labels were out, since once we went down a size, the shirts barely got to my waist.

In the end, we got one button-up shirt and two t-shirts. It wasn’t really enough, but she promised to take me again on the next payday, and the couple I had should work for me. She did say that if I felt too self-conscious, I could pair the button-up shirt with it, since it was plain and dark and would look good over the t-shirts.