Chapter 56

“What are you doing?” Sean asked. He knelt down to study the contraption the Dwarves had built.

“We’re busy, don’t disturb us,” Chom answered.

“You’re the only one here.”

Chom replied, “Okay, I’m busy.”

Since Chom was lying on his back with his fingers laced together on his stomach and watching the clouds go by, Sean didn’t think that Chom was so that busy that he couldn’t talk. He asked, “Busy doing what?”

“I’m busy working on the police car,” Chom answered. He yawned and shut his eyes.

“This doesn’t look much like a police car to me,” Sean said rising up to walk around the contraption.

“Of course it does,” Chom said opening his eyes to look at Sean.

“Well, police cars tend to be car shaped. This is shaped like a missile,” Sean said. He noticed that it even had little fins on the back.

“They want a fast police car. We built a fast police car,” Chom said explaining away any differences between what Sean expected and what they built.

Sean walked around the police car and asked, “Does it have a siren?”

“No. Stomp doesn’t like the sound of a siren,” Chom answered. There wasn’t much sense in building a new police car just to have it stomped flat again. He said, “It does have pretty red and blue lights that flash.”

“It really does look like a missile,” Sean said not finding any sign of red or blue lights. There were only three wheels with two in the back and one in the front. He wondered how difficult it would be to turn.

“It isn’t a missile; it is a police car,” Chom said getting irritated at Sean’s persistent criticism of their car.

“I’ll take your word for it,” Sean said shaking his head. He said, “I bet the first time you drive it that it takes flight for the moon.”

“It will hug the ground like a scared child clinging to its mother,” Chom said confidently. He yawned and then added, “Speaking of mothers, you might want to go get your mother if you want to eat dinner tonight.”

“What about my mother?” Sean asked concerned by the sudden change in topic.

Chom answered, “She headed out to the dump about nine this morning with your girlfriend’s mom.”

“She’s at the dump?”

“Yes.”

“Why would they be out at the dump?” Sean asked pretty sure that he knew the answer.

“The Leprechauns were out here talking to each other about there being gold hidden in the dump,” Chom said with a chuckle.

Knowing what the dump smelled like on a warm day, Sean asked, “They didn’t happen to hold that conversation where my mom could overhear them did they?”

“I do believe that your mother was busy sneaking up behind them at the time,” Chom said stroking his beard and looking thoughtful. He nodded his head and said, “Yes, I do believe so.”

“Oh, brother,” Sean said. He sighed and asked, “When will she ever learn that you can’t catch a Leprechaun?”

“Leprechaun’s do have a reputation of being rather tricky,” Chom said.

Sean went into the house. Lily was seated at the kitchen table with a bag of cookies. She grabbed the bag and held it close to her chest. Looking at him through narrowed eyes, she said, “Mom has run away without leaving any dinner for us to eat. You’re going to have to find your own food.”

“Mom is at the dump looking for the Leprechaun’s pot of gold,” Sean said. He wondered if there was a twelve-step program for weaning mothers off of chasing Leprechauns. After a moment of thought, he decided it was a little too narrow of a problem to deserve its own support group.

“Oh,” Lily said putting the bag of cookies back on the table. She thought about it for a second and grabbed the bag of cookies. She said, “You never know when she’ll return.”

“Let’s go down there and get her,” Sean said. There was a loud bang from the backyard.

“What was that?” Lily asked just when another loud bang sounded.

“I think the Dwarves are giving the police car a test drive,” Sean answered. He wasn’t quite sure why the cars the Dwarves built always made a bang when they started them. Of course, the sound of explosions was rather typical whenever the Dwarves did something. Sean looked out the back door and said, “The car is gone.”

Sean and Lily decided that it would probably be a good idea to wait for the dwarves to return from their test drive before heading out to the dump. The Dwarves were out there somewhere driving the police car at what were undoubtedly high speeds and with reckless abandon. Sean didn’t like the idea of being on the road at the same time as them.

“When do you think the dwarves will return?” Lily asked.

Glancing over at the clock, Sean said, “I’m not sure. They should have been back by now.”

“It is starting to get late,” Lily said. She reached into the bag of cookies and grabbed one.

“Can I have a cookie?” Sean asked.

“Get your own food,” Lily said clutching the bag tightly to her chest.

When the Dwarves still hadn’t returned after half an hour, Sean decided that it was becoming necessary to go to the dump anyway. If they waited too much longer it was going to be dark before they returned home.

Driving to the dump, Sean said, “Keep an eye out for the Dwarves.”

“Why?” Lily asked. She was still holding onto the bag of cookies.

“They are driving around somewhere,” Sean said terrified at the prospect of running into them on the road. It wasn’t the chance of encountering them somewhere on the highway that concerned him, but the chance of literally running into them.

Lily pointed to the sign advertising the lingerie shop at the mall and said, “I don’t think they will be driving anywhere for a while.”

Sean looked in the direction that Lily was pointing. The police car was half buried in the Shirley’s Secrets/Shirley’s Treasure sign. The missile-like car was embedded right between the legs of the rather scantily clad model adorning the sign. The back two tires were spinning lazily. Pip was underneath the car tugging on his beard. Chom was sitting astride the vehicle checking out the situation while scratching his head. He said, “I told him that it would take off for the moon.”

Giggling, Lily said, “Wow! That looks just like a scene from one of those movies on the dirty movie channel.”

“What?” Sean asked turning to stare in shock at his little sister.

“Chom’s rocket landed in her pocket,” Lily said with another little giggle.

“No more television for you,” Sean said sternly.

Lily rolled her eyes and said, “You need to learn how to clear the history file on your browser. I bet Suzie would just love to know what kind of websites you visit.”

“You wouldn’t dare,” Sean said looking in horror at the smug expression on her face. He knew that she would tell Suzie about the websites he occasionally visited if he argued too much. Sighing, he said, “Let me find out what happened here.”

Stepping out of the truck, Sean headed over to the sign. On reaching it, he asked, “What happened?”

“Nothing,” Chom answered trying to look nonchalant.

“The car is embedded in a sign,” Sean said pointing out the obvious.

“Really?” Pip said trying to look surprised. He stepped out from under the car and looked up at the sign. Going for the full innocent effect, he said, “You’re right. The car is embedded in a sign.”

“How did that happen?” Sean asked.

“I parked it here,” Chom answered while Pip snickered.

“Great parking job,” Sean said rubbing the back of his neck.

Looking a little worse for wear, Clea appeared on top of the sign and looked down at Chom. She said, “I told you I should drive. I warned you to watch out for that bump in the road.”

“It was just a wee little bump,” Chom said.

“It was a good flight. I flew about two hundred yards through the air,” Pip said grinning.

“You didn’t hit the sign,” Clea said rubbing her forehead. She had enjoyed the flight for the fraction of a second that it had lasted.

Sean leaned forward and examined the sign a little more carefully. There was a slight indention that was oddly dwarf shaped above the point where the car was embedded in the sign. A normal person would have been killed hitting the sign that hard. Shaking his head, he asked, “Are you okay?”

“I’m fine. Dwarves are tough,” Clea said.