Chapter 25

“Forty-three dollars,” Sean said pulling his wallet out of his pocket. He hoped that he still had the fifty dollar bill in it.

“And twenty-seven cents,” Sam added.

Sean sighed while he pulled the bill out of his wallet. Looking at the puddle of soda on the floor, he said, “I suppose it could have been worse.”

Looking across the disaster that was the store, Sam said, “I don’t see how. I’ll never get the floor clean.”

“At least I got them out of here before they did more damage,” Sean said. There was even coke on the ceiling. With Chom’s demonstration of what happens when a soda can is opened after shaking it, the entire troop decided to repeat the experiment.

“They are your mechanics?” Sam asked while making change. He couldn’t believe that they could replace a light bulb much less fix a car.

“Yes,” Sean said.

Sam looked over at the stack of newspapers and said, “You know that people have reported seeing Dwarves and fairies in the area.”

“I heard about that. Do you think there is any truth to the rumors?” Sean said leaning on the counter. He looked over at the store front window and saw that Chom had his face pressed against it. He waved at hand at Chom to back away.

“It is hard to say. It is a crazy world we live in today,” Sam said. He looked over at the door and saw that one of little men was trying to open it. When Liam finally managed to open the door, Sam shouted, “Stay out!”

“We’re waiting for the sodas,” Liam said impatiently.

“I’ll be out with them soon,” Sean shouted.

“Don’t try to sneak off. We’ve got both doors covered,” Liam said and then closed the door.

Rubbing his chin, Sam said, “Your mechanics look a lot like Dwarves to me.”

“That’s odd. I keep thinking the same thing,” Sean said.

“People could confuse them with Dwarves,” Sam said putting another two liter bottle of soda in a plastic bag.

“You might be right,” Sean said.

He packed the last two bottles of soda in a plastic bag. Unable to contain his curiosity, Sam asked, “Are they really Dwarves?”

“Well, two of them are Leprechauns,” Sean answered.

Sam threw a hand up in the air and said, “I thought so. For a minute there, I was afraid that I was going crazy.”

“You’re just as sane as I am,” Sean said.

“For some reason that doesn’t make me feel better,” Sam said. He wasn’t entirely surprised that Sean would be the first one that magical creatures would approach.

“Are you afraid that you’re eccentric too?” Sean asked.

“Yes,” Sam answered.

“If you’re really worried about it, you might swing by the hospital. I understand they have people who can cure that,” Sean said.

“I’m supposed to go back to school in three weeks. I think that spending the rest of my life locked up will interfere with those plans,” Sam said.

“That’s quite possible,” Sean said. It was a well known fact that being locked up tended to reduce one’s opportunities for spontaneity.

Sam said, “You go around talking about seeing Dwarves and Leprechauns ... well, people tend to think that you’re crazy and start hiding the sharp objects from you. Sometimes it is best just to keep your mouth shut.”

“Sage advice if I’ve ever heard any,” Sean said. He wondered if he was ever going to be able to manage that.

Liam opened the door and shouted, “Are you done yet?”

“I’ll be right out,” Sean answered.

Sam looked at the four bags filled with two liter bottles of sodas. He asked, “Are you going to be able to carry all of those?”

“No problem,” Sean said looking at the lightweight plastic bags. After ordering them to hold up the bottles, he picked up the bags and said, “I’ll see you later, Sam.”

“Are you going to buy the truck?” Sam asked.

“Yes. My mechanics say they can fix it up so that it will look real nice,” Sean answered. He wished that he had half the faith in their abilities as they projected.

“Why do I have the feeling that he’s about to throw away eight hundred dollars?” Sam muttered. He watched Sean step out of the store where he was mobbed by the magical folks. It took less than three seconds for them to shred the bags, distribute the large bottles of soda, and have the caps off.

Chom drank down about a third of the two liter bottle in one shot. He belched loudly and said,

“Ah, that’s good.”

“I’m glad you like it,” Sean said. He looked at the motley crew and said, “Sam’s pretty upset about how messy you left the store.”

“All he has to do is chase a naked nymph around the store for a bit. The Brownies will clean it up,” Pip said shrugging his shoulders.

“Speaking of cleaning up, that soda is kind of sticky,” Grum said. He was covered head to toe with soda. He had tried to see what happens when you try to drink a shaken soda upon opening it. The results had been spectacular, but it did little to slake his thirst.

Clea said, “There’s that stream back in the woods.”

“Good idea,” Liam said.

“I can’t wait to go skinny dipping,” Clea said.

“Oh,” Chom said without sounding excited.

“Don’t you even want to peek?” Clea asked.

Liam said, “We’ve all gone skinny dipping with you a thousand times.”

Pip said, “It is hardly worth a peek.”

Clea looked over at Sean with a speculative expression on her face and said, “I’m sure that I could find someone interested in peeking.”

Oblivious to the hint, Sean said, “Have fun everyone, I’ve got to go see Suzie.”

“What’s a girl got to do to receive a little attention around here?” Clea asked stroking her beard.

Pip said, “We’ll see you later, Sean.”

“I noticed that the invitation to the party hasn’t been removed. Are you having another play tonight?” Liam asked.

“I think so,” Sean answered.

“You think so?” Liam asked. “I would hate to show up at a party only to discover that there wasn’t one.”

“Liam, I should probably warn you that my mother is hunting you,” Sean said.

Upon hearing the news, Liam jumped up in the air and clicked his heels together. He shouted,

“Yes!”

“You’re taking the news a little better than I anticipated,” Sean said rather surprised by Liam’s reaction.

Rubbing his hands together, Liam said, “Ah, it is just like old times. The humans chase wee little me for me pot of gold.”

“Let the fun begin,” Agar said with a gleeful laugh.

“I take it you aren’t concerned,” Sean said.

“Not at all,” Agar said with a huge grin.

Liam said, “How else are we supposed to have fun?”

“I’ve got to warn you, my mother is pretty tricky,” Sean said. He had a feeling that Liam would be at his house one day complaining about having lost his pot of gold.

“All the better,” Agar said.

Like magic, all of the Dwarves and Leprechauns disappeared. Sean assumed that they were off to take a bath in the stream. He headed towards the path before realizing that he had forgotten to get a soda. He looked back at the store thinking about returning to buy one.

Deciding that he had already spent too much time at the store, he said, “Later. It is time to gaze upon my fair Suzie while avoiding her hostile father and evil mother. You know, that sounds like the makings of a pretty bad fairy tale.”

Sean walked along the path thinking about how the Leprechauns had reacted to the news that his mother was hunting them. It seemed to him that they were as excited by the idea of being chased as she was of catching them. He wondered what his role in bringing back the pantheon of magic creatures was.

Lost in thought, he walked up to the backdoor of Suzie’s house and knocked. He nearly jumped out of his skin when a hand came down on his shoulder. He turned to find Mr. Emery standing behind him. Licking his lips out of nervousness, he said, “Hello, Mr. Emery.”

“How are you doing this afternoon, Sean?” Mr. Emery asked.

Sean said, “I’m doing fine, sir.”

“I take it you came here to visit with me,” Mr. Emery said knowing that the truth was that he was the last person that Sean wanted to see.

Thankful that he was wearing women’s deodorant, Sean answered, “Sure.”

“Great,” Mr. Emery said slapping Sean on the back.

“Real great,” Sean said eyeing the distance to the path wondering if he could make it there before Mr. Emery caught him. That was kind of hard with Mr. Emery standing between him and freedom.

“You’re just in time to help me with the yard work,” Mr. Emery said.

“Oh, boy,” Sean said with insufficient enthusiasm to convince anyone that he was looking forward to doing yard work.

“I’ll ride the mower. You can trim the hedges, edge the sidewalk, and cut the grass growing around the trees,” Mr. Emery said smiling over at Sean.

“Yes, sir,” Sean said, “You wouldn’t happen to have some gloves that I could wear, would you?”

Mr. Emery shook his head and said, “You don’t need gloves. We need to toughen up those hands of yours. A man’s hand should have some calluses on them. A boy your age should have hands rough as sandpaper.”

“Sandpaper?” Sean asked.

“Sure son. Women love to know that their man is a manly man,” Mr. Emery said with a smile.

“Won’t rough hands irritate their delicate skin?” Sean asked looking down at his hands.

Mr. Emery said, “Of course, it will. That’s why a real man keeps his hands to himself.”

“Oh. I get it,” Sean said looking back up at Mr. Emery. It seemed to him that every time he looked at Mr. Emery, he saw someone different. Last night, he had been afraid that the man was going to grow about two feet taller and turn green with bulging muscles everywhere.

Today he looked like some mad scientist about to turn some poor unfortunate victim into giant worm or something.

“Let’s go get the tools you’ll need to do the job,” Mr. Emery said heading over to the garage.

“This is going to be so much fun,” Sean muttered. He followed Mr. Emery past the gasoline powered edger. He turned to stare at the powerful looking machine thinking that it would make quick work of the edging. He followed Mr. Emery past the electronic edger. It didn’t look quite as powerful as the gasoline version, but it would still save a lot of effort.

Mr. Emery stopped and pulled an old tool out of a storage bin. Sean looked at it with a sinking feeling in his stomach. Mr. Emery said, “Here’s an edger.”

“Where’s the motor?” Sean asked looking at the long stick with a wheel at one end.

“That’s the great thing about this one. It is green. It doesn’t use any electricity or produce any greenhouse gases. It runs on a renewable energy source — elbow grease,” Mr. Emery said with a smile.

“I don’t mind using electricity or producing greenhouse gases,” Sean said in protest.

“Nonsense. All of the kids your age want to be green,” Mr. Emery said patting Sean on the back.

“I look terrible when I’m green. I prefer being pale, to tell the truth,” Sean said.

Mr. Emery laughed while he dug around in the tool bin. After a minute, he stood up and held out a pair of hedge trimmers. He said, “You can use these to trim the hedges.”

“Giant scissors,” Sean said eyeing the tool with dread.

“Take it. They won’t hurt you,” Mr. Emery said putting the hedge trimmer in Sean’s hands.

“I don’t quite believe you,” Sean said with a wrinkled brow. This was bad and getting worse by the minute.

“Now where did I put those grass clippers?” Mr. Emery mused aloud. He looked around the garage for a second and then exclaimed, “I remember now.”