The Millionaire Next Door
Copyright© 2020 by Lazlo Zalezac
Chapter 64
Dan, Alison, Ann, and Sally walked up the driveway to Tom’s parent’s house. In what Dan had accepted as typical behavior for Tom’s parents, the house was over decorated for the holidays. They stopped to watch the little train make a trip around the front yard.
Alison asked, “Where did he get that?”
“I have no idea,” Dan answered as the train approached.
The little engine was emitting little puffs of smoke as it chugged along. The engine was pulling a little car filled with presents that included a little bicycle with a bow. Santa was standing on the back of the caboose waving.
Giggling at the sight, Ann said, “I like it.”
“Same here,” Sally said.
Tom opened the front door and called out, “Come on in. The eggnog is ready.”
The foursome trooped up to the house and holiday greetings were exchanged. Tom’s family was gathered in the main room singing Christmas Carols. Once the coats had been hung and everyone held a full cup of eggnog, Tom raised his cup.
“Merry Christmas,” he said.
“Merry Christmas,” Dan said in return.
“This is the life, isn’t it?” Tom asked looking around at the crowd. Amanda’s parents, Diana, Coder, Amanda, Terry, and a bunch of his relatives were packed into the room singing songs. Even Dan’s parents had come over this year. He had been surprised to see that Alison’s parents had come for some reason.
“Yes, it is,” Dan said looking over at Tom, “There’s nothing like celebrating the holidays while surrounded by family.”
“You can say that again,” Tom said.
Alison looked around the room with a smile. She was pleased to see that Dan’s whole family was present. She saw her mother and winked at her. When Dan was about to repeat what he had just said, she nudged him in the side and said, “Don’t say it.”
Pretending to sulk, Dan said, “Family is everything.”
“That’s right,” Sally said laughing at the expression on Dan’s face.
Ann pointed across the room and said, “Alison, your parents are here.”
“I know. I’m glad they could make it,” Alison said.
Sally said, “They wouldn’t have missed this for anything.”
“Missed what?” Dan asked.
“Never mind,” Sally said.
Although Terry had told him that the office party was pretty lame, Tom asked, “So how was the office party?”
“Nowhere near as nice as this one,” Dan answered. It had been people walking around with a single drink, eating appetizers, and engaging in polite banter about topics as controversial as the weather. It seemed to him that once everyone had agreed that the weather was warm for that time of year that they ran out of topics to discuss.
“Terry said it was a typical corporate party,” Tom said.
“I know. Last year it was much better,” Dan said shrugging his shoulders. The individual pizzerias did a much better job of celebrating the holidays and he had enjoyed himself at several of them.
He said, “Next year I’m going to insist on pizza and root beer. I’ll also make it known that dress is to be blue jeans and Parker’s Perfect Pizza tee-shirts.”
“That’s a good idea,” Tom said.
Sally said, “You should have seen the party at school. Now that was miserable. Everyone went in the department library and sat around the conference table eating. For the most part they talked department business. It was more like a department meeting than a party. People didn’t even wish each other Merry Christmas, it was all Happy Holidays. No one wanted to say anything that might be even mildly offensive.”
“We didn’t even bother to go to the parties at school,” Tom said. One of the older chemistry professors had told him that when he had first joined the faculty that the holiday parties were really wild. They’d make their own beverages in the lab and no one left sober. He had mentioned that more than one young coed had earned an A during those parties. He knew that kind of behavior was wrong, but Tom wondered if something important had been lost in the process of eliminating that wrong.
Diana came over to Dan and said, “Try the double strength eggnog. It’s very good.”
Laughing, Dan said, “Every year you give me that same advice.”
“Yes, but your Alison just ignored me this year. Can you believe that she went with decaf?” Diana said shaking her head. She rubbed the tip of her nose and said, “Such a waste.”
Dan laughed and asked, “Still feeling your nose?”
“Alas, I am,” Diana said with a wink.
Coder came over to where Diana was standing and asked, “Diana, which one of us is the designated driver?”
“Oops, I am,” Diana said looking down at her cup with a frown.
“I’m sure that we can afford a taxi tonight,” Coder said.
Diana grinned and said, “You’re too good to me.”
Dan turned to Coder and said, “How are you doing, Coder?”
“I’m doing most excellently. You see, this evening Diana has agreed to marry me,” Coder said winking at Dan.
Surprised to learn that she was engaged, Diana turned to Coder and asked, “I did?”
“Sure, don’t you remember?” Coder asked looking hurt.
Diana looked down at her cup of eggnog for a second. She said, “No. I don’t and I’m pretty sure I’d remember something like that even after this much eggnog.”
Coder shook his head and said, “I got down on bended knee and really made a production out of the whole proposal. There was a ring and everything.”
Diana touched her nose thinking that she wasn’t that drunk. She didn’t notice that everyone had gathered around behind her. Embarrassed, she said, “I don’t remember.”
“You’ll marry me won’t you?” Coder asked holding out a ring.
“Of course,” she answered. As soon as the words were out of her mouth, she realized that this was the grand proposal.
Coder raised a fist in the air and shouted, “Hey everyone, Diana has just agreed to marry me!”
“Hey, that’s great!”
Diana stood there for a moment and then shouted, “You ... You ... I was going crazy there.”
Coder burst out laughing and said, “I love you.”
Diana jumped up and wrapped her arms around his neck. He held her off the floor with ease as she kissed him. He might have been a lumpy kind of guy, but that didn’t make him weak.
She said, “I love you.”
Watching the young couple kiss, Ann said, “That’s so sweet.”
“You better do a better job of proposing to us than that buster,” Sally said nudging Dan with an elbow.
“Oh!” Dan said with a deer caught in the headlight look on his face.
Nodding her head, Alison said, “We’re expecting a real big production when you ask us to marry you.”
“A band,” Ann said.
“No, an orchestra,” Sally corrected.
“Right, you’ll have an orchestra playing in the background,” Ann said.
Alison said, “We expect a gourmet dinner and champagne before the proposal. You’re going to have to wear a Tuxedo.”
“Don’t forget the garden,” Ann said, “We have to be in a garden surrounded by flowers.”
“That’s right. There should be singing birds, too. We want the whole works,” Sally said nodding her head.
Dan leaned over to Tom and whispered, “This doesn’t look good.”
“Why?” Tom asked surprised by Dan’s reaction.
Dan looked around for a second and, in a whisper, answered, “I kind of ... Well, I sort of ... I thought I was already married to them.”
Before a stunned Tom had a chance to follow up on that little pronouncement, Sally said, “Speaking of getting married, weren’t you going to give Dan his Christmas present tonight, Alison?”
Dan looked over at Alison wondering why she would give him her present tonight rather than Christmas morning. He glanced over at Ann and Sally finding that they were smiling broadly. It was clear to him that they knew exactly what Alison was giving him for Christmas and, judging by the expressions on their faces, it was a pretty good present.
Bowing slightly to Ann and Sally, Alison said, “Thanks for reminding me. In fact, this looks like the perfect time for me to give Dan his present.”
It seemed to Dan that everyone edged closer around. It was like they knew something that he didn’t. He asked, “It is?”
“Yes, it is,” she answered. She took a sip of her decaf eggnog and looked around. When she was sure that everyone was looking at her, she said, “I’m pregnant!”
It was the middle of the afternoon on one of those slow days between Christmas and New Years. Tom and Dan were out at the lake where they could talk. It was cold, but there wasn’t much of a wind. Tom looked over at Dan and asked, “How does it feel to be a father to be?”
“Amazing,” Dan answered. He and Alison had been trying to conceive ever since July. Every month they had been disappointed to learn that she wasn’t pregnant. Now that it was a reality, he didn’t know what to do. He said, “I’ve never been this excited about anything in my entire life. I see my personal definition of happiness coming closer every day.”
“Do you know if it’s a girl or a boy?” Tom asked.
“Not yet,” Dan answered.
There was one thing that had been bothering Tom since the party at his parent’s house.
He asked, “What were you talking about on Christmas Eve when you said that you thought you were married?”
“I thought I was already married to them,” Dan said. The whole discussion about him proposing to them had taken him by surprise.
Tom shook his head and asked, “How is it possible that you thought you were married and they don’t know it?”
“I don’t know,” Dan said staring out at the lake water. He raised his hands and said, “I was really surprised when they started that whole discussion.”
Shocked at how wrong Dan had been, Tom figured that it was going to be up to him to get to the bottom of the matter.
He asked, “When did you think you got married?”
“Well, you know that ‘No one is exempt from death?’ Well, I figured last year that it was time to give all three women the kind of legal and economic rights that they would get in marrying me. We sat around the house and filled out the paperwork. I toasted our signing of the contracts and we all went out to dinner,” Dan said. He frowned trying to understand why the women hadn’t realized the significance of that day.
“What did you use to toast the signing of the contracts?” Tom asked.
“Wine,” Dan answered.
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