How do you feel...

When your daughter refuses to be at home

When your daughter would rather call others mom and dad

When you see her only if she directly requires you to take her places

When your health is failing

When pain is more of a friend than those around you

When your wife's health is failing

When you face an uncertain future in your career

When prayers seem to bounce off the roof of heaven

When you may need to somehow move your household across the state being only able to lift a few pounds

When sleeping does not give you rest

When tears fall like rain in the desert; they are quickly soaked up with no trace

When you would constantly rather live in the past not the present or future

When knowing life is too precious to throw away but even that wall is becoming eroded

When you face a wheelchair

When you face more surgery vs more pain

When food does not satisfy; drink not relieve thirst

When life is one long stream of "what-could-have-beens"

When there is no one to tell that would not jump to the conclusion that I needed mental help; did you dear reader?

When you realize that the world has changed and you are still in the past

When you still believe that to work for someone for many years faithfully is a good thing

When that belief is eroded to "it is no longer true or it is old-fashioned"

When honor is no longer a word your country or its people understand or believe in

When marriage is allowed to become tainted by political/social minorities Yes, that means homosexual marriage. It cheapens mine

When politicians allow us to nearly become a bankrupt nation in less than 20 years

When a test taken by someone else determines if I have a job

When making love to my wife is no longer possible

Have I lived my life to the fullest?

At this point, looking at others that I graduated with; what I have done as a career(s)[there have been too many]

I feel as if I missed something; left it behind.

All I want to know is will my family be OK?

Will my wife regain her health? Will I?

Take care dear reader that you do not fall into the trap of mediocrity that seems I have dug for myself.