Himura_battousai
Copyright© 2011 by Murasame
Chapter 172: Remembrances 9--Snow, White...
Kenshin (looking outside): No wonder it's so cold. It's snowing ... It'll cover the ground.
Tomoe: I told you before that my family is from Edo.
(Kenshin turns back from the window. Tomoe is sitting by the fire, pouring tea.)
Tomoe: There are three of us. We lived peacefully. We weren't so well off that we had money to spare, but we never went hungry. My father knew nothing of the martial or the scholarly arts, but he was a kind, loving man, good to his family and his neighbors. My mother was kind too, but she was always weak, and she died shortly after Enishi was born. Enishi never knew her. But I always took care of him, so he loved me as he would her. To Enishi I was both sister and mother. My sweet little brother. He has a tendency to judge people harshly, and he can get a little out of hand, but he's a good kid. When my engagement was announced he threw a tantrum. The worst he's ever been.
(Kenshin gives her a startled look. Tomoe takes a few steps forward.)
Tomoe: Here.
(She hands him a cup of tea.)
Tomoe: My fiancé was the second son of a similar family, a childhood friend. Like my father, he wasn't accomplished, but he was kind and hardworking. At the time, I loved him very much. When he chose me, I was very happy. But, even though I was so happy, all I could do was look at him in amazement. No matter how much I hate it, I can hardly ever smile. Maybe that's why I never told him how happy I was. "If the second son of a samurai cannot make you happy, I will at least be known as a warrior of repute," he told me. He postponed our wedding and joined the Kyoto Mimawarigumi, entering the chaos of Kyoto--And, he never returned.
(There is a slight pause.)
Tomoe: I didn't wait for the news to come to me. I went to Kyoto as well. And... (thinking) I entered in a plot to kill you. (aloud) He died, in a far-off place I didn't know. The happiness I should have had died with him ... But maybe it really was my fault. If I had cried and tried to stop him ... Because I thought that way, if I hadn't found something--someone to hate, I would have gone mad...
(Kenshin holds her close.)
Kenshin: It's all right. It's ... all right now.
(Tomoe starts to sob. Outside, the snow falls harder.)
(A little later.)
Kenshin: A little more than a year ago, because I wanted to protect the happiness of the people of this country, I quarreled with my master and left him. For that reason, I wanted to end the conflict and open a new era ... That's why I joined the Choushuu loyalists and became Hitokiri Battousai...
(Kenshin and Tomoe are curled up under a blanket by the fire.)
Kenshin: I believed that I could do that with the Hiten Mitsurugi school. But in reality it wasn't that simple. I killed and killed, without bringing the new era one step closer--I was just a common murderer. I buried my feelings, but somewhere in my consciousness the hazy smell of blood was never far away. That was when I met you. Your questions pierced the haze around me. My half-lost sanity returned to me.
I don't smell blood anymore. Only your white plum scent ... Kenshin: For the first time, I understood the seriousness of people's many different kinds of happiness ... No matter how great the skill of the Hiten Mitsurugi school, no matter how I tried to raise my own skill, one man can't hope to change an era alone. And he certainly can't bear the burden of man's happiness alone ... The only thing he can do is protect the happiness of the people he sees before him, one by one. But before that--my days as a Hitokiri will go on. Until the day when the new era is achieved, I'll push my way forward, over corpses. But when we reach the new age--maybe this is foolish of me--I want to find a way to protect others without taking life. While finding a way to atone for the crime of stealing other's happiness with my own hands. Tomoe...
Tomoe: Yes?
Kenshin: The happiness you lost once, in all this violence. I'll protect it this time for you.
(Tomoe smiles.)
Tomoe: All right...
(The next morning. Tomoe gets dressed and picks up her diary. Kenshin is still asleep.)
Tomoe (thinking): This man stole my happiness once. And he gave me another happiness. He'll kill again. But he'll protect more lives than he takes. He must not die here.
(She steps outside.)
Tomoe: Farewell ... my second love.
(She closes the door behind her.)
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