Chapter 3: The Healing

Again I was up very early, beating even Alfred to the clock. Fearing how messy things might get with what he had in store for me, I took great care with my preparations, had a long soak in the pond and gave my remaining teeth a gum-bleeding workout.

Remembering what Alfred said about my cigarettes, I decided to have a last smoke or two. I went down to the waterfall and here, sitting under my now favourite tree, blowing spirals of blue, listening to the soft sounds of water tumbling down, I found peace after all, resigned to my fates, whatever they might be. From above, I heard Alfred's voice.

"Good morning to you. Are you ready for your, rather our great experiment?"

As usual, Alfred's impeccable choice of words and timing immediately sent all feelings of peacefulness on their way. But still, I was as ready as could be.

"Good morning, Alfred, and yes, I'm prepared. Do your thing and let's get it over with. But shouldn't you be here with me?"

"Very well. I am here. Listen now to how we are going to proceed. Come back up and you will find a blindfold on the table. Put it on tightly. It is 20 % translucent. This is not to prevent you from seeing me, but to keep any visual impressions from interfering with your treatment. Of course, you will also have to strip down completely. Keep your dentures though, as they might not fit afterwards if you don't."

I did as I was told, not without strong misgivings, experiencing a stab of despair as I shed my clothes and put on the blindfold. No sign of bashful Alfred, though. As he had said, I was able to make out faint distinctions between light and shadows, nothing else.

Suddenly, there was the lightest of touches on my arm, guiding me over towards the right-hand pool, stopping me when we reached it.

"I installed steps here as an afterthought, they are very shallow, just about 3 cm each, and go right around the now enlarged pool. From your experiences with the first healing I gathered that we have to be able to control your immersion in the water very precisely. I haven't made another body scan of you, but I think that you should be quite alright to enter slowly up to your thighs. From there on, I will be monitoring you completely, guiding you and, at the same time, checking progress on the computer.

"I told you about the pain you should expect. When, at any stage, it becomes too severe to endure, say so and we will pause. But continue we must, since it is imperative that this procedure be followed through till it is completed. On the other hand, a lot of healing has already taken place, so it may not be all that bad. We shall see.

"Come, my friend, let us start towards a new life for you."

His voice, so screechy when we first met, cajoling, threatening, insulting, condescending, even merry sometimes when we started to get along better, had now taken on a darker timbre, yet retaining a disturbing dissonance. I realised that Alfred had to be just as scared as I was. I turned to where I thought he would be.

"Yes, Alfred, let's do it. But before we start, let me thank you for all you have done for me. You have given me more than any other person I ever knew and you helped me to get to know myself better along the way, too. Thank you.

"I cannot know how this experiment, your processing, will turn out, and it doesn't really matter any longer. I am prepared for success as well as total failure. So, should anything go wrong at all, you are not to blame yourself. Just find a gentle way to let my wife know that I was happy to the very end. And, considering the extremely rough beginnings of our friendship – there, I have said it now, Alfred –, you should not be afraid either."

The silence was deafening and lasted a long time. Suddenly, the light pressure on my arm became firmer for a fraction of a second and without a further word I was guided to take the first step, much like a stunned sheep being led off to slaughter.

The water was pleasantly warm, and the pain started immediately. Nothing bad but it made me realise that the first healing had indeed been mostly superficial. I have never claimed to be a hero, but for this I need not be, yet. Without prompting I advanced some more steps into the water. More of the same, some moderate pain, followed by a stinging sensation before diminishing entirely. By now I was so attuned to my body, that I could tell what was happening to me. Ah yes, that age old fracture of the left ankle, almost forgotten, but never quite right either, the varicosities in the legs, the meniscus trouble and then, after another few steps, more work on the femur. Although it was early days yet, I thought I could get used to the pain after a while. Knowing what was happening was quite enlightening after all. This method of learning would be excellent for students of medicine, nurses, physiotherapists. Teach them plenty about pain, too.

I hesitated to take the next couple of steps since I knew what lay ahead. The pressure on my arm increased slightly, nudging me forward slowly but inexorably. As soon as I immersed my old butt I was, almost to the letter, in deep shit. Work on the prostate was a scream – my own I'm afraid. Trying not to make too much of a show of it, I held my breathing as shallow as possible, panting like a woman birthing triplets. Even so, there were times when I felt like I was going to pass out. Not even the most severe attack of gout ever gave me this exquisite pain: clear, sharp and dominating my entire being, filling me, twisting me until I doubled over, eyes bulging from their sockets.

How long it took I cannot say. Any perception of time or duration was gone, my mind numb. Of course, eventually I came out of my stupor, gasping, and filled my lungs with great, deep inhalations to stop me from shaking.

"You did that very well. Your prostate is healthy now, all that remains to be cleared up here are some bad metastases into the colon and pelvis. Shall we continue?"

Just nodding my head I immersed myself deeper. I won't repeat myself. The pain was there and it was bad, yet I managed to keep my mouth closed, perhaps groaning occasionally, as the turmoil in my guts seemingly carried on and on. And I knew it when the infractions into my pelvis were attacked. This time I would have foundered with possibly fatal results had not trustee Alfred reached for me with both hands and pulled me upright once more.

"Hang on for a moment. I will be right back."

Within a short while he was at my side and held a beaker to my mouth. "Drink this in very small sips and try to keep it down. It will refresh you and give you some strength as well."

I drank the quite bland, slightly bitter liquid as I was told and nodded to Alfred. "Let us continue. Thanks for bearing me up."

Nothing more was spoken. I took small step after small step, stopping when some heavy action took place, but my interest in what was happening inside me was very strong by now. I wondered about something, though, and spoke up.

"Alfred, is it okay to talk while we are doing this?"

"Certainly, if you are up to it. What is on your mind?"

"It feels as if some work is being done on my plastic aorta now. But didn't you say that this would not be altered?"

"Let me check a little closer on this. Ah, here I have it. It appears that the connective tissues in your body were rather weak. A small aneurism had newly developed where the implant was spliced into the aorta near your pubic bone. But this is now a thing of the past. The aneurism is healed; the tissue has been strengthened to standard specifications. You will be alright."

Famous last words? Never mind, somehow I plucked up some more courage from the hitherto unplumbed depths of my character and prepared myself for the worst as the water level reached up to where the pancreas should be.

I was right on the button. My face screwed up, a massive spasm jerked my body rigidly upright as white pain smashed into me which made all those grotesque inflictions of Dante's Inferno look like silly kindergarten fun. With tendons stretched to shearing I held on frantically as wave after wave of the most excruciating pain flooded me, the heart bucking and hammering away in my chest. If this should be the end, I wish it came about quicker I remember thinking, when I heard Alfred's soothing voice.

"This must be very bad. Don't be ashamed to scream, holler and bellow if it helps you. You don't have to prove anything, you are very brave indeed. But try to not thrash about too much, please, I have to be able to hold on to you."

The transformation, when it finally came about, was dramatic. The pain disappeared quite suddenly, to be replaced by a serene calmness. However, I asked Alfred to give me some respite before taking the next couple of steps.