Chapter 18

Soon we were again wandering the City streets admiring the tall centuries-old buildings in the district around the Half Man. The garden and its earthly delights couldn't have seemed further from the growl of slow moving traffic and the crush of innumerable pedestrians. The mid-afternoon sun shone down from a sky only occasionally enlivened by the odd fluffy cloud.

Beta paused outside a grand imposing building, perhaps two or three hundred years old, distinguished by a large triangular stone motif of a woman and an ape carrying geometers and telescopes supported by tall fluted pillars. A statue of a woman stood high on a pedestal at the entrance whose simple cloth garment dropped sufficiently to display her rounded breasts and most of her upper torso. She gazed up at the sky while clutching a large abacus in her arms as if it were a musical instrument.

"What kind of building is this?" Beta wondered, standing in front of the statue and staring up at the forbidding array of windows that dotted the limestone exterior. "It's not a museum or art gallery is it?"

I pointed at a large carved stone on which were sitting several chimpanzees and a macaque, all wearing white overcoats and surrounded by a scattering of books. A small chimpanzee wearing glasses dangled her feet over the enormous carved letters: THE ACADEMY. Smaller letters beneath displayed the rest of the title: of Social and Physical Sciences.

"The Academy?" mused Beta. "I've heard of that. It's the centre for research and development for the entire country. It deals with science, philosophy, religion, economics, and almost everything else there is to know about. Shall we have a closer look?"

We strolled past the statue to the foot of the marble steps leading up to the building, which we ascended reverently and peered through the wide open doors of the main entrance into a massive hallway.

"It's as vast as the interior of the Cathedral!" gasped Beta. "No wonder it's got such a venerable reputation."

"And unlike the reputation for superstition of a cathedral, it has one for Truth and Knowledge!" commented a young woman in her late twenties, who, like the chimpanzees outside, wore a long white coat that reached down to her knees. She scrutinised us through a pair of thick spectacles. "Good afternoon. My name is Pandora. Pandora Serenissima. I am an official Academy guide. My function is to escort visitors around the hallowed corridors of the Academy, and my services are provided by the Academy free to anyone who wishes to take advantage of them."

"That's very generous," I remarked.

"The founders of the Academy believed that the work pursued within these walls should be available to all. They regarded Truth and Knowledge not as a patented commodity to be hidden from sight and accessible only to the few: so unlike the élitism practised by the various religions. If you so wish, I shall gladly take you on an escorted tour."

"That sounds a wonderful idea! What do you think?" Beta asked me.

I looked around the quite monstrous proportions of the central hallway that still by no means reached the very top of the building. Ahead of us a wide marble staircase led up, floor by floor, past balconies and small windows, from which could be glanced the occasional silhouetted figure or the back of a computer screen. At the very top was a huge archaic clock whose roman numerals were perfectly visible even from this great distance. On either side of it stood plaster figures of scantily dressed women carrying more instruments of measurement and calculation. A pendulum dangled from the domed ceiling and swung backwards and forwards some six yards above our heads. There was a general bustle of people, many wearing white coats like that favoured by Pandora, but others sporting a mix of tweed and corduroy.

"The Academy was not built in a day," Pandora recited, beginning her duties without waiting for my response. "This enormous building has grown up steadily, room by room, floor by floor, from its very modest beginnings many centuries ago. Its original purposes were associated with biblical interpretation and astrology - activities which continue to be performed but attract very little in the way of grants and celebrated throughout history by the construction of grandiose monuments. Some of these can be seen in the Academy's gardens where they still perform their outmoded purposes of capturing solstice sunlight in baskets and randomly throwing sticks. However, as science and knowledge has grown, so too has the Academy to its modern grandeur, advancing vertically upwards storey by storey, and expanding sideways by the steady acquisition and appropriation of adjacent buildings. This process is set to continue for as long as business and government award grants for the many different branches of research pursued by the Academy."

"What has this research produced?" wondered Beta.

Pandora laughed. "Just look around you! Look at the City. Look at the Academy. Look at the cars, the trains, the computers and all the modern conveniences. All that is the result of work pursued here. Without it there just wouldn't be a modern society. It's all technology driven. And that technology didn't come from nowhere. It was produced by the work for which the Academy is famous. We would still be crossing the seas by sailing ship, toiling with quill and papyrus, freezing in winter and living from day to day. There would be no television. No space exploration. No computers."

"But don't plenty of people still live like that?" objected Beta. "In the Village we still don't have many of the benefits you talk about."

"That's a political problem. That's not the fault of Science. As I see it, and of course I speak as an individual rather than as a representative of the Academy, Science provides and Politics distributes. One should not confuse the two. Science in itself is blind. The knowledge the Academy brings can be applied in countless ways. It can be for the universal good and it can rain death and destruction down on us all. That isn't the fault of Science. That is the fault of political systems."

"Shouldn't the Academy be working towards the common good?" Beta persisted.

"That is a political decision. It's not one for the Academy to be concerned with. It is here to provide enlightenment and knowledge. And doesn't that in itself have great intrinsic worth? Why should the Academy be troubled when its brief is simply to uncover the great truths of the universe? That is its purpose. And that is what it does well. If we didn't know such things: why then we would be no better than primitives who lived in simple self-sufficient communities!"

"But I come from such a place," Beta argued. "We don't find any real need for Science there."

"Nonsense!" sniffed Pandora. "Simple principles such as crop rotation, efficient harnesses for horses and good agricultural implements all come from Science."

"But hasn't Science brought a lot of problems to the world?" I asked.

"We now know that it's as nothing compared to the destruction that the natural world can wrought. In any case, look at all the uncountable physical, mental and health benefits Science has brought through medicine, arts and economic growth. Nobody could deny that we are all healthier as a result of antibiotics, inoculations and body scanners. We now know so accurately what the causes are of pollution, economic crisis, starvation, disease and warfare. We now know exactly how to improve everyone's lot."

"Then why are so many people so poor and ignorant?" Beta asked.

"Politics. People. Stupidity. That's all. Science can't be blamed for its misapplication. We may know how to solve the big problems in the world, but it takes political will to apply it. The Academy wasn't built as a political institution, and that is just and right. The fine work done here is available for everyone, and if the result is nuclear bombs, cruise missiles and ozone depletion: then so be it! It is for government, whether Red, Coition or Illicit, to make the crucial decisions."

We followed the guide as she strode forward on her flat shoes and up the marble staircase past election posters, already peeling now their use was expended. There were almost equal numbers of them for the Red and Illicit Parties. We strode along a balcony, peering down on the vast hallway, along which occasional stalls were selling political literature. One was covered with pictures of Chairman President Rupert and his marsupial face featured prominently on the tall piles of green books.

"The Illicit Party seems to be very popular here," I commented.

"Yes, I suppose it is," Pandora mused, as if she had never considered this before. "I can't answer why. Politics is not my subject. But there are many people in the Social Sciences department who might know. Would you like to speak to one of them?"

"That sounds interesting," Beta replied. She grimaced at a poster of Rupert outside a door and crudely painted graffiti which read: Beware! Red Traitor! next to a cartoon of an inoffensive orang utan in an ill-fitting denim jacket.

"We are in the Social Sciences department now," Pandora continued, as we turned off the main balcony and walked along a corridor of ornate wooden doors marked by black plaques on which names of Professors and Doctors were printed in White below their specialisations. These included Modern Politics, Mediæval Housing Policy, Sociopathology, and Racism, Sexism and Ideological Correctness. "I must confess it's not an area of study with which I'm terribly familiar. It all seems very inexact to me. I'm sure that it has provided the world with great insights: but I fail to see how such widely disparate opinions can be held without there being some sense of incoherence. How can Economics be considered a science if there are so many widely different interpretations as to what generates economic growth or even what economic well-being actually means? However, I'm sure Professor Schwarz will be able to enlighten us."

She stopped outside a door where the professor's name was displayed just above a poster of President Chairman Rupert and the single word: TRUTH. His department was known as Contemporary Sociopoliticoeconomics of which he was the Professor Emeritus. She knocked on the door and on hearing a response she pushed it open to reveal a large study in which the walls were covered by shelves upon shelves of books and a few more posters featuring the face of the President Chairman. A relatively elderly gibbon sat in a leather chair wearing a tweed jacket, smoking a pipe and reading a large book. He glanced up at us and an indulgent smile peered through the clouds of smoke emanating from the pipe.

"Good afternoon, Pandora. Showing more visitors around the Academy? And who have we here? Welcome. Welcome. I always enjoy entertaining visitors. And why, Pandora, have they thought it desirable to come and see an old ape at study?"

"This young lady was asking questions about the apparent popularity of the Illicit Party and I thought you would be the obvious candidate to answer her questions..."

" ... As I am a card-carrying member of the Illicit Party, no doubt? But I am really quite a recent convert. For many years I confess my political views were unashamedly socialist, but I have in recent months found much to persuade me to switch my political allegiance. And now, rather than celebrating, I am rather disgusted by the victory of the Communist and Anarchist Insurrectionists in the General Election. This is a catastrophe of the first order which justifies any action of reprisal or civil disobedience." He lowered the pince-nez which attached itself precariously to the end of his flattened nose. "I take it that from where you originate the Illicit Party has not gained the significance that it is gaining elsewhere. Perhaps you are unaware of the clarity of vision and the solid scientifically verifiable ideological basis of Illiberal Socialism?"

"Well, yes," admitted Beta, standing by the side of a large globe of the world while the gibbon took another puff from his hooked pipe. "We've seen a great deal of activity from the Illicit Party while we've been in the City. A lot of it seems to be very destructive and antisocial."

"If the ends are justified then so too are the means by which to attain it. What this country - and every other country on this planet - needs is strong government blessed with a clear vision of where it wants to go and not afraid to do what is necessary to get there. A party with an ideology that understands the need for strong central power vested in one person - in this case that of President Chairman Rupert. An ideology set on the discovery and prudent application of the Truth. A party firm and unwavering in its ideological purity, but flexible to change that same ideology in every possible detail to further its ends and the greater good of the people of the Illiberal Socialist state. A party which recognises the necessary links between careful monetary management and strong defence, and does not kow-tow to the malevolent socialist and liberal policies of trades unions, intellectuals and artists."

"I just don't know what it is that the Illicit Party represents," Beta wondered. "All we've seen of it is violence and intimidation."

"In the right place, these methods of political persuasion, along with indoctrination, terrorism, assassination and kidnapping, are all integral to the pursuit of far-reaching and irreversible change. Let us not be shy about this. Political change is not a painless process."

"But why Illicitism?" I asked. "Why should I support Rupert's party rather than the Red, Black or Green Parties?"

"The Illicit Party is the party of the resolution of antitheses. It is a party which has the boldness to adopt the best of political ideologies long thought of as opposites. A party which adopts the traditional Communist policies of economic centralisation; political control through Party infiltration at all levels; and an end to the dominance of the working class by the petit bourgeoisie. A party which also adopts the Black Party policies of racial purity, dictatorship and the militarisation of civil society. A party not afraid to sacrifice jobs, personal freedom and pluralism to economic growth, progress and pragmatic dogmatism. No other party offers so much and can reconcile so many apparently opposing views."

Pandora laughed. "I really don't understand you social scientists! Only you could possibly believe that it is possible for a doctrine to be two things simultaneously. Aren't there reasons to support the Illicit cause that might be more persuasive to the scientist?"

"Historical necessity," answered the gibbon, with a wild look of triumph, thrusting his pince-nez into the air while resting the leather patch of his elbow on the desk. "The study of Sociopoliticoeconomics has proved that all political change comes about because it is necessary and unavoidable. As society changes - whether through technological innovation or military conquest - then its ideological underpinning must also change. I am convinced that the inevitable and unavoidable consequence of the changes in our highly complex society demands the adoption of an ideology which seeks to reduce these complexities to simple and undeniable concepts such as those pursued by the Illicit Party. Power. Truth. Wealth. What simpler goals of government and social change could there be? A society freed of the baleful influences of Cats, intellectual dissidence, pacifism and religion. A society cleansed of the evils of homosexuality, feminism, modern art and uncertainty. A society focused like a laser beam on the greater good revealed by the Truth."

"I still don't see how it is historically necessary that Illicit ideology should dominate," Pandora objected.

"It just is. Society is a complex interweaving of social, political and economic factors, and political parties succeed best when they represent the purest essence of its nature. No party better reflects our modern society than the Illicit Party. Consequently, the Illicit Party will and must take power. But don't listen to arguments of political necessity alone. Think also of the desirability of Illicit government. The purpose of government is to facilitate the greater good of the society it represents. That greater good can best be measured in terms of economic indicators and territorial extent. What Illicitism promises, - and has delivered in the Illiberal Socialist Republics, - is economic strength as proven by its copious statistics of production and productivity, coupled with an unashamed hunger for extraterritorial acquisition. The combination of aggressive centralised economic policies with an equally aggressive military stance equals the best method of political and social advance, at the expense only of the cancerous elements of society which most deserve to be cauterised."

After leaving Professor Schwarz's study, Pandora led us to an elevator and beckoned us inside. "So much for Social Sciences!" she remarked. "If we'd spoken to Professor Biyad we'd have learnt why pragmatism is the sole purpose of government. Or to Doctor Rosso why, as society is a thoroughly mutable phenomenon, it is impossible to properly understand it. I'll take you up to the Physical Sciences department where differences of opinion are on a much smaller scale."

The doors of the lift opened and we were in corridors quite obviously more modern, where the doors had no handles and the names of the occupants were written on small LED displays just by the side. "This is where true knowledge is acquired. Here and on the many storeys towering high above us. Here are studied the eleven dimensions of the universe; the fractions of the Avogadro number; the metaconsistency of fractals; the curvature of time; the instances of dark matter; and other such crucial subjects upon which has been built our current prosperity and happiness."

"I don't really understand how that is," Beta objected. "I'm sure my life hasn't been that much improved by knowing that space and time bend under gravitational force, or that the entire universe was originally just a perturbation in infinity. I'm sure that my life would be just as happy and profitable if I thought the world was as flat as a pizza, only six thousand years old and that the moon was made of green cheese."