Chapter 9

Eddie was a little bit disappointed by the outcome of the bike riding. Sarah was supposed to at least find it a little bit challenging.

At lunch time he'd gotten the spare bike out of the shed and greased it up and checked that it worked. Then he'd ridden around the yard to show Sarah how to ride a bike. When he told her that she was going to have a go, she'd sat on it and showered him with questions. When she couldn't think of any more questions, she'd closed her eyes for a few moments, thinking, and then stood up while pushing the pedal down. For the first few meters the bike had wobbled alarmingly, but after that she'd figured out her balance and taken off like a rocket. Stopping had been a bit of a problem; it turned out that she hadn't been listening as carefully as she thought, but she solved that by simply riding straight into Eddie.

Eddie caught the bike and then Sarah when she slipped forward off the seat. Sarah leaned into him and rested for a moment. She was glad that she hadn't fallen off, but she could feel her heart pounding; riding the bike had been both exciting and terrifying. Eddie pushed her off again and she rode around the yard some more, gaining confidence. While she was riding, she glanced over at Eddie and felt a rush of warmth. He was being so good to her. Before this, she had been worried about why he was helping her, how much she owed him, but this feeling was something different entirely. She felt as though she just wanted to go over and run into him again, just so that he'd catch her, and she could get into his arms again.

This was a new feeling, and Sarah rolled it around in her mind all afternoon, thinking about it, matching it against the feelings her mother had told her about. So was this that thing called love?

Fortunately Wal and Eddie kept her busy that afternoon. They were cutting up a tree that had fallen down. Eddie had the idea that she'd sit quietly and watch, but Sarah had never been that kind of girl, and she could see all sorts of reasons not to start being like that now. Though initially their chainsaws had been a bit of a shock, she was no stranger to using an axe, and she could see that trimming the smaller branches made it easier for the chainsaws, so she grabbed their magnificent axe, far better than any she'd ever used before, and worked her way down the tree, really putting her shoulders into it. This had so impressed them that when she demanded a go on the chainsaw, Wal had given her a thorough safety lesson, and they'd let her cut the smaller stuff up.

At the end of the afternoon, Sarah sat on the trailer and relaxed against all the firewood as they took it back to the house. In spite of the fact that she was soaked with sweat, she was feeling good; she'd enjoyed the hard work, had been thrilled to use the chainsaw, but it had been the look on Eddie's face that had really filled her with warmth. He was sitting on the trailer next to her, enjoying the late afternoon sun, and she shifted a little towards him so that their legs were touching.

She knew that she'd be feeling all that work when she woke up the next morning. She had a stab of pain in her shoulder when she used it push the old fridge door closed while she was making Paris' milk. Still, in spite of these warnings she still felt good, a nice warm feeling inside her. But that feeling evaporated as soon as she gave the bottle to Paris.

Paris took a single suck, and then pulled away, making a distressed noise. Sarah looked at the bottle, and then checked its temperature, it was fine. She sniffed it, and it smelt wrong; badly wrong, a dangerous smell, but one that she didn't know. Her heart stopped. What had she done wrong? She shut her eyes and ran through the preparation of the milk — no, she hadn't done anything wrong. She glanced down at Paris to check on her again.

Eddie came at a run when he heard Sarah's scream. Jill was just behind him. They saw Sarah crouched down holding Paris and sobbing. When they came up, she pointed to Paris' mouth, with newly swollen lips, and sobbed "There's something wrong with the milk."

Eddie ran over and grabbed a hose, turning the tap. He rushed back and gave the hose to Jill so she could wash Paris' mouth while Eddie held Paris down. A few seconds later Wal turned up, and Eddie explained quickly.

He took over immediately. "Eddie, take Sarah and check how she made the milk. Jill, run and get me the phone." Eddie grabbed Sarah and pulled her running after him. She could hardly speak and she couldn't get the door of the fridge open, but as soon as Eddie opened it he could see exactly what had gone wrong. Where the vitamin mixture had been, there was a very similar brown bottle, but the label said "POISON" instead. Eddie grabbed the bottle and headed back for Paris at a run, arriving at the same time as Jill.

Sarah followed Eddie back. Obviously he had known exactly what she'd done wrong, but she still didn't. She felt wretched, and she could hardly breathe for worrying about Paris. Looking after Paris made up for missing Jean, she missed the baby so much. She just didn't know what she'd do if Paris died.

In the end it was a close thing. Once Wal read out the details on the bottle on the phone, the vet told Wal to intubate Paris and then to simply wait until the swelling went down. Wal used a bit of the hose for that, and by the time he had gotten it into Paris, the little lamb was starting to look off color. Fortunately once Wal had gotten the tube in, Paris had rapidly recovered, and they'd all be able to relax a little. But only a little, they were all concerned about Sarah, as she was clearly close to breaking down.

Sarah felt just a little better once they explained what had happened. Wal had used a bottle of poison earlier in the day, and he'd put it back in the fridge in the place where the vitamin mix went. Because Sarah couldn't read, she hadn't noticed, and Wal was very sorry that he'd moved the bottle. It didn't help that much. While they didn't think it was her fault, she was the one who couldn't read, and here was her baby lying on the ground bleating softly, clearly in a lot of pain.

She spent the next hour watching over Paris, doing what she could to make it feel better. It helped, knowing that Paris was going to be okay, and also The Dog set himself up next to her, giving her warmth and comfort. He seemed to feel when she was down.

By the time Danni served dinner late, Paris was fine, and she'd finished off a new bottle of milk, but still, Sarah sat quietly through dinner. Eddie's family was really being nice about it, and in the end she had to pretend that she didn't feel bad about what had happened just so that they would stop going on about it. But she wasn't okay, really, she was acutely aware of this big gap in her life. Eddie's world might be comfortable and fun, and full of interesting things, but it was dangerous, and she had no idea about this stuff. Who would she hurt next?

When dinner was finished, Eddie told Sarah to stay sitting at the table, because she was going to start learning to read. She had mixed feelings about this, she really wanted to cuddle up to Eddie and feel his strength, but she knew that she needed to be able to read.

Eddie went somewhere and came back holding a bunch of books. He sat down at the table next to her. "Sarah, everyone here learns to read as a child. So, well, we have some books that are good for little kids to learn to read, but they're no good for you. Still, they're all we have, so we'll have to put up with them."