A Charmed Life
Chapter 12: FNG

Copyright© 2016 by The Outsider

16 November 1987 – Fort Bragg, North Carolina

Jeff shifted the weight of the duffel bag on his shoulder as he crossed the company area from the headquarters building to his assigned barracks. He would finally see his barracks room – his home for the next three or so years – in a few more minutes. His Fort Bragg experience thus far had been limited to filling out paperwork at the Reception Company.

’Here’s where the rubber meets the road,’ he thought, thinking about the difference between theory (training) and application (doing).

He’d been training for the Army since the beginning of July. Now he was going to be in the Army learning what that meant. After a full weekend of in-processing with the prospect of one last day tomorrow, his head was spinning. Jeff just wanted out of his Class-As, into a set of BDUs, to get dinner, and then to crawl into bed. Seeing the 82nd Airborne patch on his left shoulder still gave him chills. His biological grandfather died wearing that patch.

Entering the Alpha Company building, Jeff saw the signs pointing the way to 1st Platoon and headed that in that direction. Other signs pointed to his squad’s floor and his squad leader’s office. In this barracks, he’d share a room with one other soldier. This was unlike the huge open barracks bay during training, where he bunked with forty-five others.

A private first class in a battle dress uniform grabbed him when he passed the 3rd Squad’s lounge.

“Hey, are you the new guy?” the PFC asked, pulling Jeff into the common area. “Come here and get in on this!”

Jeff took in the scene: a second PFC stood over a third sitting in a chair holding a book. These other two appeared to be taunting the book reader, and it brought back memories of people harassing him in junior high school. It pissed him off.

“No, I don’t think so,” Jeff growled before he turned back to the door.

“Hey, where you going, New Guy?” the second PFC confronted him.

The second man’s name tape read ’Jaeckel.’ Appropriate. Jeff gave the large man a hard look.

“You want me to help you torment another soldier, one who is apparently in my platoon, when I haven’t even reported to my squad leader yet? Get stuffed. I was on the receiving end of this shit in junior high school, so no thanks! I might be the new guy, and I might be right out of training, but I already know what the term ’Bravo-Foxtrot’ means. I think I’m looking at two people who embody the term.” He turned on his heel and left.

Out in the hallway, Jeff took deep breaths to calm down. He looked again for the squad leader’s office, Room 319. There it was, right next to his room, 317. He dropped his duffel on his bunk. His roommate wasn’t there. He walked next door to report in.

“Sergeant, Private Knox reports,” Jeff said, standing at attention.

“At ease, Private. Have a seat,” his squad leader said.

Jeff sat nervously while the sergeant stared at him, trying to get a feel for Jeff. Finally, the sergeant spoke up.

“Welcome to Third Squad, Knox. I’m Staff Sergeant John Tyler. I’ve been looking at your jacket. This is only a copy by the way; the original is back over at headquarters. Honor grad three times in a row? An ARCOM and two AAMs before even reporting to your first unit? An average of two-ninety-one on your APFTs so far? Not bad, soldier!”

“It’s all been theory up until this point, Sergeant. I still need to experience being a soldier,” Jeff said. “I’ve had a run of good luck, that’s all.”

“And humble, to top it all off. I think you’ll do well here. You reported to Lieutenant Cherrington and Sergeant First Class Hantula when you arrived, I imagine?”

“Yes, Sergeant. When they both got to the office this morning.”

“Good. Why don’t you go introduce yourself to your roommate and get settled in? It’s almost chow time. We’ll talk more later. Dismissed.”

Jeff stood and went to attention, executed an about-face, and stepped smartly out of the room. Jeff walked next door to his room where he came face-to-face with a nightmare. The three PFCs from the lounge sat staring at him. Jeff swallowed.

’Oh, shit... ‘

“So you’re my new roommate?” asked the one who’d been the others’ target in the lounge. His name tape read ’Takahashi.’

“Hai!” Jeff responded automatically. Shaking his head, Jeff explained, “I beg your pardon, Private Takahashi. My karate Sensei back home was also named Takahashi.”

“Ken,” Takahashi said as he stood and held out his hand. Jeff took it. “My name is Ken. Thanks for sticking up for me back there. Carl, Frank, and I are all supposed to be getting new roommates soon, and Carl” – Ken indicated PFC Jaeckel – “thought up that little test we just put you through. We wanted to know what kind of people we’ll be sharing rooms with.”

“Nice job, by the way,” Jaeckel remarked. He rose and offered his hand. “Carl Jaeckel, good to meet you.”

“Jeff Knox,” he responded. Frank Widmar, the private who had pulled him into the lounge, introduced himself also. Jaeckel and Widmar took off after a few minutes of getting acquainted.

“You speak Japanese, then?” Ken asked him after the door closed.

“No, I know the words I needed at the dojo. I studied karate for four years. Sensei was originally from Tokyo.”

“My parents come from down by Hiroshima. They raised my sister and me to speak Japanese and English. I can teach you the language if you’d like?”

“I think my family would be impressed if someone could teach me English...” Jeff joked.

“Don’t let this place beat the sense of humor out of you,” Ken replied, laughing. “I meant ‘I’ll teach you Japanese if you would like?’”

“I would, thank you,” Jeff said, sincerely.

“It’s the least I can do after you stood up for me.”

“I felt like I was back in junior high school, getting bullied again. I couldn’t stand that shit then, either. This was a chance to react like I didn’t when I was in junior high, so I did.”

“Whatever the reason, I appreciate it. Carl, Frank, and the rest of the squad will give you a break on the FNG stuff because of how you reacted. Do you have your meal card for the dining facility yet?”

“I do. I just need to knock out some push-ups and sit-ups, get into a set of BDUs, and I’ll be ready.”

Jeff unpacked his duffel bag onto his rack, shook out his best set of BDUs, one of only two sets with the 82nd patch on them so far, and inspected them for wrinkles. Finding none, he undressed down to his briefs and t-shirt and pulled on his PT shorts. He dropped to the floor to start knocking out push-ups. When he finished a silent count, he flipped over and did sit-ups. Finished with his PT, he changed into an Army-brown t-shirt and his BDU pants. He pulled on his jump boots, and then put a five-button wool sweater on under his BDU blouse.

“All set, Ken.”

“That was quick. You did how many of each?”

“One hundred of each. I’m a little behind today.”

“A little behind?” Ken was incredulous. “If that’s ‘a little behind,’ then how many do you usually do?”

Jeff shrugged. “I’m up to doing at least five hundred of each per day, and a five-mile run when I can. The run’s been hard to do every day since I joined up, but then it’s not like they don’t make you run in training.”

“That’s incredible!”

“I’m used to it now,” Jeff shrugged again. “I started working out like this the summer before high school. I did some whenever and wherever I was able during the day and, before I knew it, I was up to five hundred a day. Come on, I want to eat. I’ll get back here to put all this stuff away, and I’ll crash. I’ve got one more day of paperwork and in-processing to look forward to. What time is reveille?”

“Zero-four-forty-five.”

“That’s about what I’ve been used to.”

The new friends left the room and headed out to get dinner.


Jeff tried again to wipe the crust out of the corners of his eyes. He filled out more paperwork in the company office early the next day. He slept well the night before, but a mix of early morning PT, breakfast, and a hot shower did not equal an awake Jeff when you added paperwork. He initialed and signed the final page and returned it to the stack.

“Congratulations, Private, you’re all done,” said Specialist Josh Tomlinson, one of the headquarters office staff. Jeff smiled as he leaned back into his chair. “You’re all done... here.”

Jeff’s smile disappeared. “Oh, that was cold.”

“Well, we office staff have to get our kicks where we can,” Tomlinson laughed. “You still have to draw your equipment at supply.”

“May you die slowly from a thousand paper cuts.” Tomlinson laughed again. “And fall into a vat of peroxide before you do.”


Jeff walked back into the room the following evening carrying a trash can liner with his newly issued web gear in it.

“You all done?” Ken asked.

“I hope so,” Jeff grumbled. He dropped the bag in his closet. “I thought that stuff had to be returned in better condition than this? I guess whoever had this crap missed that class in Basic. And this was the good set! You should have seen the shit they tried to give me first!”

Jeff spent the last few hours with water and a stiff-bristle brush trying to get the mud off the gear, and that was after hours filling out the last of his in-processing paperwork. He’d ask Ken to look at the web gear another day, to see how he did cleaning it.

“I might be better off buying my own,” Jeff groused.

“Lots of guys do that. So, tell me again about this new stuff you heard about at supply? The new waterproof gear?”

“I guess it’s supposed to replace the field jackets. The specialist over at supply said the folks at Natick Labs have been working on a whole new system of waterproof jackets, liners – even pants – that are supposed to be made out of that new Gore-Tex stuff.” Jeff shrugged. “I guess they’re going to be rolling it out next summer, so we’ll have it next winter.”

“Which means, in true Army fashion, it’ll get here the summer after that, it will suck, and they’ll get it right the second time – in five years.”

“I defer to your greater knowledge and experience in the matter,” Jeff joked.

“Just you wait, New Guy. You’ll see. You said you met the LT and our platoon sergeant yesterday?”

“Yeah, before I started with all the company in-processing fun.”

“Sergeant Hantula has been here a couple of years, so he’ll probably PCS in a couple more. The LT just got here a few months ago. He’ll be here longer; he seems like he knows what’s up. Sergeant Tyler got here about the same time as I did. You ready for chow?”

“As long as it doesn’t look like mud tonight,” Jeff grumbled.

“This is the Army,” Ken reminded him. “Don’t get your hopes up.”


“I think I need a shower after shaking Infante’s hand.”

Ken chuckled. “That’s a common reaction. My family wants to come to visit, but I don’t want him near my little sister yet. Certainly not until she’s sixteen at least. Maybe not even when she’s twenty-six!

“My sister’s a senior this year, and already seventeen. She’s not visiting until he’s ready to PCS! That guy’s a legend in his own mind.”

“He’ll needle you a little as the new guy...”

“I figured on catching stuff like that as the FNG,” Jeff shrugged. “I can handle him. I can even put him in his place without kicking his ass.”

“From what you’ve told me, that’ll be a new experience for you.”

 
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